Misdirected Ramblings from the afflicted

"You're a blowout on a birthday cake
and I'm a birthday candle"
-Ryan Adams

There's nothing like melancholy folk music to accentuate the unfortunate situation you find yourself in. Suffice it to say, I am sick, which is weird in itself. Because I don't get sick. I just don't. I honestly can't remember the last time I got sick; must've been junior year or something. And of course, I am stricken with this the week that Biola is performing an opera. There's nothing like a fit of coughing from the orchestra pit to ruin the drama of the magic flute. . .

"Where is Tamino?"
"He is here, to bid you a last Farewell."
"A la-"
(COUGH COUGH COUGH COUGH)
"A last Far-"
(COUGH COUGH COUGH COUGH)

I think I'm doing a little better, thanks to the wonder that is Tylenol cold and sinus, but something is still bothering me. Maybe not one something, but a couple of somethings and I can't quite put my finger on it.

This whole thing could be another friendly reminder from the Big Guy upstairs that I'm not in charge of this life I'm trying to live, which to me is the scariest part about being sick. I can take all the medicine I want, but on some days nothing I do keeps me from coughing my lungs up. But it also reminds me that, in reality, I'm not in control of much anyway. I'm sure glad God knows what he's doing, because I sure as heck don't.

There's always that weird feeling that comes out of nowhere when you see a good friend finally happy with someone. You want to be happy for them, and you are, but for the most part it is a constant reminder that you have yet to find someone.

Music is one of the most powerful forces that moves the hearts and minds of men, right? Why, then, were many of those that created some of the most beautiful stuff so messed up? Why was Mozart, for lack of a better term, a pompous ass? Why was Lizst an egomaniac?
And, to change the focus for a bit, why did Chopin die of TB alone and miserable? Why did Beethoven, who singlehandedly brought music from classical to romantic, go deaf? Why did Nick Drake overdose on deppression medication before he was recongized for any of his work?

Why did Oedipus deserve anything that happened to him? Why do birds fly in V's and how the heck to they know to do it? Why do minor keys evoke sadness? Why do some people see animals in the clouds where some just see cumulus, nimbus, etc? Why do sunsets make us feel amazing and strangely sad at the same time?

This doesn't make much sense, I'm noticing, but no one said it would. So there.